Each and every one of our weddings are affected in some way on traditions passed down through generations – whether we stick with them, or decide to shun them. Here is Stef, one of our Real Brides-to-be to share some of the fascinating information she’s found out on her wedding journey…
Hello again! I am very excited to be back on these pretty pages! As Elle said in my intro post I also write over on Rock My Wedding as a Real Bride; so I thought I would do something a little different here and look through some wedding traditions or things we do because “that is what you have to do”. Once we know the rules we can see what wonderful ways there are to keep with tradition or break the rules all together.
Firstly I want to break a few rules that are not really tradition at all but we seem to follow anyway. Planning myths and traditions we all seem to stick by unnecessarily. After all the only thing we HAVE to do is getting married as religion and/or law dictates, the rest of the ceremony and day is up to us. There are some hilarious rhymes you can chose to follow to help your planning such as picking a day:
Monday for health,
Tuesday for wealth,
Wednesday’s the best of all.
Thursday brings crosses,
And Friday losses,
But Saturday – no luck at all.
No luck at all for me then! (Or LLLM writer, Elle!!)
The second tradition I want to look at is the idea that you have to have an engagement of roughly one year; not too much more and not too much less than a year. Well quite frankly you can plan a marriage and a wedding in whatever time you want. It is true that some dresses need to be orders months in advanced and some venues and suppliers are booked up years in advanced, but if you are a little bit flexible and really good at your research there is no reason you can’t have a short engagement. I have attended a wedding of friends who organised the whole thing in just 7 weeks of getting engaged! It is even true that at short notice you can get some great deals on suppliers who don’t want a day doing nothing!
If you decide to hold a weekday wedding or a Sunday wedding, the chance of suppliers being free and willing to give a discount increase hugely. Even if you don’t manage to get a discount, it is always possible that venue you have always admired or band you always wanted are free at short notice by chance or by cancellation. Dresses can be bought off the rail at high street stores or by buying the bridal boutiques sample you can get the dress you always dreamed of at short notice and at a fraction of the cost!
Plus, the longer engagement you have, the longer you have to save! Which ultimately gives you more choice and flexibility with your budget. We were planning on going with tradition and hoped to have a 10 month engagement but then we realised saving for a wedding and our first home at the same time was not a great idea and would put too much pressure on us financially! So we moved it 8 months in to the future and now with 7 months to go I could not be happier with our decision for mutliple reasons. We’re now having a spring wedding when all my favourite flowers are in bloom. We also have more time to find our perfect house and have a bigger deposit saved. Our families have more time to adjust to the engagement. My dream photographers are available! AND I get the opportunity to write on these very pages! Big YAYS all round!!!
Another tradition that people DO like to stick to (but you really don’t have to) is wearing white on your wedding day. Here is another ‘helpful’ rhyme..
Married in White, you have chosen right.
Married in Blue, your lover is true.
Married in Pink, your fortunes will sink.
Married in Green, you will not long be seen.
Married in Red, you’ll wish you were dead.
Married in Yellow, ashamed of the fellow.
Married in Brown, you’ll live out of town.
Married in Grey, you’ll live far away.
Married in Black, you’ll wish you were back.
Without giving too much away I am going to be sticking with tradition and wearing white; but where do we get this idea from? The tradition originates it popularity when Queen Victoria wore a white lace gown on her wedding day; and like all royal wedding a trend became tradition. Before this though brides wore whatever colour they fancied; dark colours and reds being popular and blue common amongst. So I say wear whatever you want!
And besides, look at these colourful Brides… don’t they look AMAZINGGGG?!