Wedding Nightmares

When previous Brides I’ve spoken to mentioned they had ‘wedding nightmares’ in the lead up to their wedding, I kind of brushed them under the carpet thinking IM SO ORGANISED NOTHING CAN GO WRONG, RIGHT?!?!

Uh. No. According to my first full on wedding nightmare last night, it can ALL go wrong.

Here’s what happened…

My venue wasn’t my venue – the outside looked exactly like my venue, but inside, it was actually my old secondary school hall – a grey, 1960’s, undecorated square. As I looked around at our guests, they weren’t our friends and family; they were in fact all my ex-boyfriend’s friends!! I started to panic that it was 2pm and I didn’t have my flowers and the ceremony was supposed to be starting. I went to investigate and finally found my florist – and she’d brought me blue and yellow carnations – a far cry from my ‘real life’ white bouquet (and what I was expecting in my dream). Once I had the bouquet I gave the organist the cue to start playing my aisle song – instead of the romantic song I’ve chosen, she decided to play Darth Vader’s theme tune and as I was walking my bouquet fell to pieces and by the time I was at the end of the aisle I had two droopy blue and yellow carnations left. When I got to the end of the aisle, my fiancĂ© was so fed up of waiting for me that he’d taken off his jacket and tie and was looking very bored. Our registrar was a scatty old man with crazy white hair who didn’t know what he was doing – so much so that he didn’t do any introductions, we didn’t have any readings or vows and all he said was “you may kiss the bride”. And no one clapped. AND the kiss was terrible!

O.M.G.

When I was telling my fiancé about this dream this morning, he was in hysterical tears of laughter (mainly at the Darth Vader part). I was in hysterical tears of laughter AND fear.

I have 98 days to go (or 3 months and 1 week) and realistically I can plan 24/7 right up until I get married. But I can’t stop things like what happened in my wedding nightmare happening in real life. Having this dream has actually relaxed me in one way – of course if this does all happen on our wedding day I will be kicking some SERIOUS butt on those who failed us, but I guess on the day the only thing that really matters is that we’re married….

P.S I think that if we didn’t have vows or declaratory words this means we didn’t actually get married….